There can be no confidence killer greater than not being able to last in the bedroom. It leads to sexual dissatisfaction and tears up a relation that may be already be falling apart. A healthy sex life is important for a healthy relationship. Relationships suffer a lot when you are hit by premature ejaculation.
If you’ve had this problem for some time, you may have tried every tip you could find on how to stop premature ejaculation. Some men invest time and money in products and drugs that bring no results. Worse yet, they end up avoiding sex altogether.
If you are struggling with early ejaculation, you are not alone. Many men these days want to know how to avoid premature ejaculation. This article will guide you through some time tested and scientifically proven ways on how to cure premature ejaculation.
1. How to Stop Premature Ejaculation: Addressing What Causes It in the First Place
Premature ejaculation is not like a regular headache that will go away by taking a painkiller. The roots of this issue may go deep, so you need to understand them before you can work on stopping premature ejaculation.
For some, it may occur due to no apparent cause and only happen occasionally, but for the rest, there is a solid psychological or biological cause for this condition.
Here is what can lead to early ejaculation:
The Psychological Causes of Premature Ejaculation
Although early ejaculation can affect men of any age, but it is a common finding among younger men in their early sex years. Men usually learn how to prevent premature ejaculation as they age and get more experienced sexually.
Premature ejaculation can have a number of psychological causes like:
- Anxiety: The incidence of premature ejaculation is higher among men suffering from anxiety.
- Depression or Guilt: Men with depression and feelings of guilt find it hard to stay longer in bed and tend to ejaculate early.
- A Negative Self Image: You are more likely to suffer from this condition if you are dissatisfied with your body or have a negative self-image.
- A Broken Relationship: Relationship problems are one of the leading causes of premature ejaculation. An unhappy relation may lead to issues like sexual dissatisfaction, erection dysfunction and premature ejaculation.
Underlying Culprits in Your Body: Biological Causes of Premature Ejaculation: While in most cases premature ejaculation is the result of sexual inexperience or some psychological causes, in other instances, it may represent a grave biological cause.
The biological causes of premature ejaculation include:
- Erectile Dysfunction: If you want to stop ejaculation prematurely, it is going to take some intentional effort. Premature ejaculation is common among erectile dysfunction sufferers. If you have erectile dysfunction, you may focus more on getting and maintaining an erection instead of controlling premature ejaculation.
- Low Testosterone Levels: Testosterone is the male hormone that gives you the manly attributes you have. It helps with firm, hard and lasting erection and helps with the ejaculation amount and timing, as well. You are more likely to ejaculate early if you have low testosterone levels.
- Hyperthyroidism: Thyroid is a gland in your neck that releases a hormone called the thyroxin. Hyperthyroidism is when thyroid releases more thyroxin than usual. Higher thyroxin levels have a number of physical manifestations and one of them is premature ejaculation.
- Inflammation: Inflammation of the structures that make up your genital tract may contribute in premature ejaculation. It includes inflammation of the prostate, as well as seminal glands and the urethra.
- Spine Injury: The nerves that control your time in bed come from the bottom of your spine. Any injury to the lower part of the spine may cause you to lose control over your reflexes like urination, defection and ejaculation.
- Inherited Traits: Surprisingly, this problem may be inherited, so it may run in your family. Since most people avoid talking about it among family members, the research is hard to compile on this potential factor.
- Imbalance of Brain Neurotransmitters: The act of sex and ejaculation is under the influence of chemicals in your brain called brain neurotransmitters. Among the neurotransmitters that play an important role in controlling the time of ejaculation, dopamine and serotonin are the most important.
Serotonin helps you last longer in bed and increases the time of your intercourse. Dopamine, on the other hand, does the opposite and helps you ejaculate early. Higher dopamine and lower serotonin levels may contribute to early ejaculation.
It is important that you look out for all these causes, as one or more of the above mentioned culprits may be why you cannot last longer in the bed. It’s important that you talk to your doctor and get a proper medical checkup before you can start with the use of a premature ejaculation cream or premature ejaculation pills.
You may also want to talk to a psychiatrist or a psychologist about your mental and relationship health status. Creams and pills for premature ejaculation only treat the symptoms and not the root cause, offering only a temporary fix. By pinpointing your specific causes, you can address them with the help of your doctor, and possibly fix the issue for the long-term.
2. Learn How to Control Your Ejaculatory Reflex
One of the most effective ways on how to prevent premature ejaculation is establishing a control over your ejaculatory reflex. As mentioned before, controlling your ejaculation takes a little intentional effort, too. With practice and patience, you can increase your time of intercourse, and be able to relax and have fun with your partner again.
Here are a few tips on how you can control your ejaculatory reflex and increase the time needed for ejaculation:
- Masturbate, but in the Proper Way: Masturbation is technically the same as having sex. So, you can practice on how to increase your ejaculation time by masturbating before indulging in the real act.
Here is how you can achieve this feat:
- Increase the Frequency of Masturbation: First, let go of any myths and misconceptions about masturbation. You won’t go blind or grow hair on your knuckles. To masturbate is perfectly natural and in fact, can be healthy in moderation. Despite the common belief that masturbating more than once a week may lead to erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation, the exact opposite is true.
Research says that masturbating three to four times a week is perfectly healthy and can actually decrease the risk of complications, like prostate cancer. In fact, there is no set number of times you should masturbate every week. You can masturbate as many times as you want, as long as it does not interfere with your daily life activities.
Masturbation can help you increase the time in bed. By masturbation, you are actually mimicking the actual act of sex. You learn how to tune your emotions, not getting agitated or excited and even delay the time for ejaculation. How does that happen? The detail is in the coming text.
- Masturbate with Both Wet and Dry Hands: It is a part of getting used to all types of situations. You tend to lose control over your ejaculation when you are put in a new kind of situation. Masturbating with both wet and dry hands will prepare for all such possibilities. More detail about this is in the coming sections.
- Identify Your “Point of No Return”: The most important part of masturbation is trying to find your “point of no return.” It is that point of climax that leads to orgasm soon after. If you can learn how to identify that point and delay it, you can surely increase the time needed for ejaculation.
Here is how you can identify this point of climax and prevent premature ejaculation:
- Try finding a comfortable corner in your room away from distractions. Choose a comfortable sofa or a chair to sit in.
- Put on some music or anything that would help you relax. Do not watch porn or anything explicit while masturbating. Use your imagination.
- With or without a lubricant on, start stroking your penis. Start from the bottom of your penis and slowly go to the top of its shaft. Do not stroke the tip of your penis just yet as it is the most sensitive area of your man part and stroking it would lead to early ejaculation.
- Do not stroke your penis vigorously. Keep stroking it gently, going from the bottom to the top of its shaft. Keep doing that until you know you are about to come. Stop at that very instant.
- After stopping, do not touch your penis for a couple of minutes and let it settle down. Breathe deeply during that time and try to divert your attention to something else.
- Repeat the process two or three times more.
- In the last go, caress your penis from the bottom all the way to the top, including the tip and keep going till you achieve orgasm.
This may sound difficult to you at first, but it is one of the surest ways to cure premature ejaculation. If you can master this technique, you can surely increase your ejaculation time several fold and enjoy sex for longer durations.
3. Delay Your Orgasm With Kegel Exercises
You may have not heard about these exercises, but kegel exercises are one of the most effective home remedies for premature ejaculation. Here is how these exercises work.
Your pelvis is made of a group of muscles called the pelvic floor muscles. These are a group of powerful muscles that control activities like micturition, defecation and ejaculation. Premature ejaculation can be the result of weakening and inability of these muscles to perform their normal functions properly.
A research was conducted to see the effects of Kegel exercises on premature ejaculation. The study included 40 men that had an average ejaculation time of less than one minute. The participants were asked to do pelvic floor or Kegel exercises for 12 weeks. Results were collected at the end of 12 weeks and were analyzed.
The results at the end of 12 weeks showed there was more than a two-fold increase in the ejaculation time. The mean time needed for ejaculation increased from less than a minute to more than two and a half minutes.
Here is how to do Kegel exercises:
- You can do these exercises in any position, such as while you are sitting, standing or while lying down.
- One of the exercises is to forcefully shut your anal muscles. Keep them shut for three to four seconds and then let them relax. Do this five to 10 times in one sitting.
- An important part of these exercises is controlling your breathing. Breathe deeply and try to link the contraction of pelvic muscles to your breathing patterns.
You should be able to see results in as early as two to three weeks. The more your practice, the more time you will get to enjoy in bed.
4. Use The “Refractory Period” During Sex to Your Advantage
What they show in porn is unrealistic and overrated. The human body, especially the male body, is not designed to sustain several minutes or hours of relentless sex as they show in porn. Sex is a vigorous activity and takes a good deal of physical toll on your body.
That is why it is natural that men ejaculate early, because that is how their bodies are naturally designed. According to some estimates, the average time of sex among Americans is seven minutes which includes only two to three minutes of pure intercourse.
You may have observed that you lose your erection after ejaculation and it takes you some time before you can acquire an erection again. For different people, the time needed to achieve erection again is different. This is called the “refractory period” of your sex.
Instead of not doing anything and waiting for the erection to return, you can use this period to your advantage. Here is what you can do:
- Achieve your first erection and be done with the intercourse and orgasm.
- As soon as you land in the refractory period, please your partner with methods other than intercourse.
- As soon as you get the erection, you may indulge in the second session of sex that may last longer than the first one.
This solution may sound only temporary and you may not even agree with this approach, but this method has worked dramatically well for a number of couples. You get to enjoy sex for a longer period of time and both partners end up achieving orgasm, so it is a win-win.
5. Tune Your Penis to Varying Sensations
One of the biggest reasons why you may end up having an early ejaculation is because your penis is not used to different kinds of sensations. Here is what this means.
Your penis is an extremely sensitive structure. When you frequently have intercourse or masturbate, your penis gets used to that kind of feeling. When you switch to some other method, it may cross the sensitivity threshold of your penis, and you may end up ejaculating early.
Here are some of the premature ejaculation cures that involve tuning your penis to varying sensations:
- Use Lubrication: In the absence of lubrication, your penis becomes extra sensitive, so you achieve ejaculation upon the slightest stimulus. To avoid that, use adequate lubrication before intercourse or masturbation.
- Use a Condom: While you may not like wearing a condom as it blunts the sensations of your penis, that is the entire point of using it. Wearing condom slightly decreases the sensation level of your penis and you last longer in the bed this way.
- Do Not Carry Matches to a Dynamite Factory: Avoid overdoing foreplay. Let’s think of it this way. Say your sexual stimulation is graded on a scale from zero to 10, where 10 represents the point of maximum stimulation and point of orgasm. If you get into a foreplay that takes you to point seven or point eight on that scale.
You get into sex at that point, then it is quite logical that you would achieve orgasm early. On the other hand, if you get into an intercourse while you are at point four or five then you are more likely to last longer.
6. Use The “Squeeze Technique” to Stop Your Ejaculation
This may sound like a weird way to prevent premature ejaculation, but this method sure does work. Here is how this method works:
- Get into the act of intercourse with your partner.
- Pull out as soon as you feel you are going to go loose.
- At that very instant, hold your penis at the junction between its tip and its shaft.
- Squeeze it tightly for a couple of seconds till you feel you are not going to ejaculate anymore.
- Once done, carry on with the intercourse.
Things may get a bit messy the first few times, but that is fine. You will master this technique after a little practice.
7. Try the “Breathing Technique” to Last Longer
This technique is especially effective if you are the kind who gets agitated or frustrated quickly. It is also effective if you are struggling with anxiety and depression issues.
Here is how this technique works:
- Get into the act of sex with your partner as usual.
- Instead of breathing haphazardly, try to take deep and regular breaths.
- To further the benefits, try to synchronize your breathing pattern with your or your partner’s movements during intercourse.
- Try to consciously maintain a regular breathing pattern.
- When you feel like ejaculating, focus more on your breathing than on the act.
This technique requires some practice. But once you have mastered it, you’d surely see visible results.
8. While You Work on Things: Using a Premature Ejaculation Cream or Premature Ejaculation Pills
It takes time to use your doctor’s recommended method on how to stop premature ejaculation. While you are waiting for your treatment to kick in, using a premature ejaculation cream product or taking premature ejaculation pills can help you get your love life back on track.
Here is how these things work:
- Premature Ejaculation Creams: A premature ejaculation cream is basically a topical anesthetic. An anesthetic is a substance that reduces the sensation at the applied areas. When you apply a premature ejaculation cream on your penis, it numbs your penis and blunts its sensations for some time. This way, it gives you a little more time to have sex without having to ejaculate.
- Premature Ejaculation Pills: There are a number of premature ejaculation pills that work by different mechanisms, for instance:
- Anti-Depressants: Since depression is one of the main causes of premature ejaculation, the use of anti-depressants is an effective way of controlling premature ejaculation.
- SSRIs: Serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) are useful, because an increased level of serotonin in the brain helps in increasing the time needed for you to achieve orgasm. These pills work on stopping premature ejaculation by increasing the amount of serotonin in your brain.
- Phosphodiesterase-5 Inhibitors: Doctors recommend these pills to treat erectile dysfunction, but also function to delay the time needed for ejaculation.
Premature ejaculation can be an embarrassing and troublesome issue. Most of the ways on how to stop premature ejaculation require a good deal of patience and practice, but all of these methods are worth investing your time into. Once you have succeeded in controlling premature ejaculation, you can enjoy a healthy and more vibrant relationship with your partner. Before trying anything on how to prevent premature ejaculation, it is always a smart idea to talk to your doctor and get an expert opinion.